Just when I thought I was running out of things to be pissed about…

Have you seen this?

Motto:  Kleenex – finding new ways your home is killing you every day.

Fuck, if I hated the environment that much, I’d just run around slaughtering baby pandas and waving my hair dryer over the polar ice caps.


What’s next?

Your food is only as clean as the pots and pans it was cooked in – new disposable pans from Calphalon!

Your clothes are only as clean as your washing machine – new disposable washing machines from Maytag!

Your ass is only as clean as the toilet it was sitting on – new disposable toilets from Kohler!

This. Madness. Must. End.

And also? I’m pretty sure people don’t want their home bathrooms to feel like a WalMart restroom.  Just guessing.

What a stupid move, Kleenex.  Seriously.  FAIL.

PS>I have a drying song, too.  It’s to the tune of Mary Had a Little Lamb and it goes like this:  “Just go dry your fucking hands / fucking hands, fucking hands / Just go dry your fucking hands / On our normal hand towel.”  It’ll be a major hit among all the reasonable people of the world.  All three of us.


9 responses to “Just when I thought I was running out of things to be pissed about…

  1. Better copyright that song, Elvis. BTW, we threw away the kitchen instead of cleaning it.

  2. I have installed these in every room in the house. Nifty idea!

  3. Um, make that 4 of us. Hell, half the time I dry my hands on the pants/shorts/burka that I’m wearing.

    The “throw away makes you healthier” bullshit makes me crazy!!!!!

  4. WOW! I could *NOT* agree more. I am in the advertising industry and almost daily I am tempted to create a satirical ad campaign in the style of “strong paper towel” commercials, but have it be about actual kitchen TOWELS.

    Another thing that gets me is that if you sit near a water fountain at the zoo for more than a few minutes you will notice that half the Moms will NOT let their children near that “dirty thing.”

    Again, I am in the advertising industry, but I must ask… Why do people believe commercials? Are they all that stupid?

  5. I KNOW, RIGHT?!?! I saw these and just went, “No, that isn’t…that’s, like, for…what, hospitals or something? Because that can’t be for your…ohmygah…”

    It’s just…really, Kleenex?!

    Sigh…one step forward, two steps back…

  6. I totally saw that too and was really pissed as well. Really, Kleenex? Hand towels? Really? In Eco-Friendly times you’re going to bring out DISPOSABLE HAND TOWELS?!!

    You know? What did we do BEFORE all these “sanitary” products? I certainly don’t remember anyone dying from getting the bubonic plague from a handtowel.

  7. This made me LOL. Thanks. ^_^

  8. This post seriously had me laughing out loud. What a ridiculous product!

  9. Wow. There’s a lot of blogs about this, doing a google search.

    Here’s my take on the same.


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