Top Ten Reasons to Commute by Bike

10.  The opportunity to “wake up” for the day by dodging assholes in black Tauruses.

9.  Bugs – especially those picked out of your teeth – are an excellent source of protein.

8.  Carrying heavy, awkwardly-shaped, wheeled things  up and down stairs is fun!  Bonus points if it must be done at both ends of your journey.

7.  Play “Tetris in Real Life” as you cram a potted plant, travel mug of tea, lunchbag, zippered portfolio, U-lock and purse all into one small wire basket.  (Or, if you’re especially coordinated and/or daring, balanced on the rear rack).

6.  Discover all sorts of exciting new ways to MacGuyver yourself into some semblance of kempt-ness in an office restroom, using only paper towels, a faucet, and Chapstick.

5.  Never get coerced into driving the lunchtime carpool.

4.  The thrill of feeling your knees buckle as you climb the stairs to your third-floor office, after trying that particularly invigorating, hilly route.  Bonus points if you must grab the staircase railing to prevent toppling over.

3.  An easy excuse to go home early:  “Uh-oh…here comes the rain!  Better try and stay ahead of the weather.”  (Most effective after 4:30, or 4:00 on Friday)

2. Learn – or invent – all sorts of fancy new insults for the douchebag who stopped in the crosswalk, the asshat who left a snarky note tied to your handlebars, and the dimbulb who told you to “go ride on the sidewalk!’.

And the number one reason to commute by bike…

1.  Helmet hair is sexy as hell.

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2 responses to “Top Ten Reasons to Commute by Bike

  1. Dude! Where’s the picture of the helmet hair?? 🙂

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